Thursday, 9 February 2012

Home is where the Heart is

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It has been a very long time now that Wad and I have been in this routine.   By 'this routine' I mean that he works away all week and comes home to us at the weekend.  But that isn't even 'the routine' anymore.   There is no longer a routine. Wad's work absences have been stretching into increased periods away from hearth and home that now he can be apart from us for two weeks at the time... It's awful.   Bubble is now at an age where she now recognises that Daddy leaves and as such has some separation anxiety with him. When he is home, she won't let him out of her sight.   It is quite a stressful situation and only places more strain on the already taut nerves of our family unit.

It has been an even longer time that Wad and I have dreamed of relocating to Australia.   We're watching lots of family and friends flee the recession here in the UK to find their place in our dream and that's hard too. 

But in a way the 'routine' has made it more imperative for us to be together as a family than to find a way to Australia.   So Bubble and I are going to join Wad across the water.   We've found a cute little abode that will serve as our castle, from where we will plan our attack against the invading hordes of the double dip recession.   We'll stand together as a family unit because that is the only way we're going to get through this difficult period in our life.

And when it's over, we'll tell the story of our 'hard times' to our children, berating them on how easy life is for them... living in the sun, surfing every day, eating al fresco.   We'll tell them how hard we worked to get where we are, that they should work hard too so that they can enjoy the fruits of their labour.

And they will roll their eyes and stomp off, grumbling about Mum and Dad's 'life lecture' that they've heard a HUNDRED times before!


Sunday, 5 February 2012

Grateful For Grandads

Bubble's paternal grandfather has been AWOL for six months.  But then, he is notorious for disappearing for months at a time so this is nothing unusual.  He is an alcoholic and has been battling with this for the last 17 years.  For a period of about 5 years he was dry... he was even in attendance at our wedding.  Everyone thought he was a very charming and affable man.  But then his wife passed away from cancer and he fell into the drink again and has not really made it out since.

It is difficult for Wad to discuss his father.  He has experienced alot of pain and hardship as a result of choices his father made.  He will never forget that, ultimately, when forced to choose between his family and the drink, his father chose to drink.

Is it odd for me to say that I am grateful for the way Wad's father treated him?  Wad's father, through his maltreatment of Wad, has actually solidified Wad into the most dependable and caring man.  A completely devoted father.  He has vowed never to let his wife and family down.  He works like a slave to keep us afloat in this recession.  He cannot get enough of Bubble and is desperate for the time that is just him and her.

The complete opposite to the way his father behaved in a very similar situation.

It's a sad story and one that most likely will not have a happy ending.  But I am grateful for the influence that Bubble's grandad has had on her father because we are in a much stronger position as a family because of him.

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